Survive the Holidays

It was the night before Christmas, and in all your space, not one counter was clean, everything was out of place. The stockings were not carefully hung by the fireplace, as you have been searching all day and cannot find them anywhere. No one was curled up in their beds as there was a lot in the way that everyone slept in the layers. Neither of us could find our bandana and cap, we were both so stressed that at any moment we could break. When there was such a crash on the roof, I tripped over six piles to see what happened. I went flying towards the window, I flew like a lightning, the blind was broken and also the leaf … ‘

We hope you like our funny parody of a wonderful old Christmas poem. Unfortunately, many people don’t find much joy in the hustle and bustle of Christmas. Somehow, the holidays tend to creep up on us, catching us stressed and overwhelmed. There are visions of table settings that would rival Martha Stewart and food that is not only tasty, but coordinates with the color theme of the occasion. The holidays spark great ideas in all of us. We caught ourselves thinking, “if I had more time”, “if I had more money”, “if I worked a little harder”, “this is the year I’m really going to …”. does any of that sound familiar?

Thanksgiving and Christmas are a myriad of complicated events. No other party throughout the year has so much pomp and circumstance associated with it. They are so close together that Thanksgiving seems to be the harbinger of Christmas stress. And most of the stress is self-induced. We seem to push ourselves a lot to make the Christmas cards, buy the best gifts for everyone, get all the decorations out early, have school parties for the kids, buy unique and amazing gifts for the teachers for $ 10 or less, attend a lot of festivities. festivities, experience the spiritual events leading up to Christmas, prepare the most fabulous and tasty Christmas treats, and so on. I’m tired of just thinking about it!

Why can’t we just let it go? Would there be a cosmic disturbance if we didn’t send out cards this year? Would children be scarred for life if we only put up half of the Christmas decorations? Would our social life fall apart if we just said “yes” to one or two Christmas parties? Why so much pressure?

Watching TV last night, I remembered where some of the pressure comes from. There was a commercial for a local department store. The models wore matching Christmas outfits, lounged on beautiful new furniture with a cashmere blanket, and admired all of their new gifts in their masterfully decorated room. It was a perfect vacation. I don’t know about you, but when we open presents at my house, I’m barely awake, my hair doesn’t seem perfect, I’m wearing my old comfortable robe and sitting on our used furniture. It is not the vision of perfection, but it is ideal for us. Is it less festive because we don’t look like perfection in the commercial? My vision of perfection is not what my family looks like, but how the holidays make us feel. It doesn’t take a lot of effort on anyone’s part to feel meaningful at Christmas, to feel loved and special.

I grew up in a modest home. Every year my sister and I waited with anticipation until JC Penney’s thick holiday catalog arrived. We went through each page imagining what a wonderful toy Santa Claus would give us. When Christmas came, the catalog pages were torn, the corners were bent, and the book looked tattered. That was part of our festive ritual. We knew we wouldn’t get every toy in the catalog, even though we chose a lot. I also remember that we use the same decorations every holiday and put them in the same place. Some of the decorations were made by my sister and I, and we were very proud to put them up every year. It was part of our vacation. It’s what we did.

How do we make our vacations meaningful and yet stress-free? The following is a list of five tips that will reduce stress during this busy time of year.

1. Let go of great ideas. Making your holiday cards individually would be really amazing, however, do you want to spend so much energy and time on something that is usually thrown away when the holidays are over? You don’t need your table to look like a magazine. Allow your kids to make their decorations and centerpieces and then you can check that off your to-do list. Also, consider hiring help. Have someone set up your decorations, lights, prepare your food, etc. Let someone else help you so you can enjoy your vacation.

2. Strive for wholeness, not perfection. Flylady (http://www.flylady.com) has a theory that a job not perfectly done is still a job done. His thinking is that the end result is a finished job, not a job done to perfection. Both Lori and I are asked a lot “is your house perfect all the time”? We both have kids, so obviously the answer is “no.” We both also understand that our bottom line is always organization, not perfection. We live for that in our work and in our personal lives. We always encourage that of others as well. The pursuit of perfection takes too much time and energy, and it seems to leave things undone because they can’t always be done perfectly.

3. Plan your month. Traditions, memories, warm loving feelings are all things that people try to create during the holidays. Unfortunately, somewhere in between comes the holidays, the shopping, and a lot, a lot of stress. Try to come up with a plan at the beginning of the month for how you will handle some specific stressors, such as decorating the house inside and out, shopping, all the parties, etc., so that you don’t yell at the family when things come up. . at the last minute and you’re not ready. It takes some discipline, but having a plan for this busy time will force you to be more prepared.

4. If something goes in, something must come out. This is a firm rule of ours and applies especially to this holiday. Seeing our children’s faces when they open a gift they have been eagerly awaiting is a wonderful feeling. We all want to support our families and give them the things they want. We also want to be able to walk in their playrooms and need some weeding after the holidays. It is much easier for children to let things go when they see lots of new things. There are so many people in need this season and their discarded toys will make another child’s season that much brighter.

5. Breathe. It sounds cliché but it works. Lori and I have been working with Robin Schmeerbach, Brown Belt Nia Certified Instructor and Holistic Personal Trainer from St. Louis. She has been helping us come up with some training techniques to help improve our minds and bodies. We recently worked on breathing. Neither of us knew how we breathed. Robin informed us that Lori is a typical chest breather, and I am a mix of chest and tummy. “Being aware of our breathing connects us to our autonomic nervous system, which creates a deep state of relaxation,” says Robin. We don’t really think about the actual act of breathing, it’s just something that happens. Robin has been showing us how to become aware. Consciously breathe deeply and slowly and visualize our lungs filling with air and then letting the air out. This new awareness of our breathing helps us in all aspects of our life, especially in stressful situations.

It is possible to make our vacations meaningful and less stressful. Letting go of the things that are not so important is vital to a more streamlined vacation. Using the steps above as guidelines for coping will serve as a good foundation.

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