Too often we spend our lives trying to live up to the expectations of others while denying ourselves our own sense of personal worth. Are you sure this is wrong? Were we really put on this planet to be puppets controlled by others or should we live a happy and fulfilling life?

By living the kind of life that suits us, we are actually doing more for others than if we lived our lives on their terms. Ultimately, it’s harder to be around people in need with little sense of self-worth than it is to be around those who know what they want and where they’re going. Sure, there will always be those who would rather control us than enjoy watching us grow and prosper as independent individuals, but are they really the kind of people you want in your life?

In order to feel any sense of self-worth, there are five points that must be met.

1. Don’t let others invalidate your feelings.

How many times have you been told ‘calm down’, ‘control yourself’, don’t get so sad’, ‘stop getting emotional’ or similar words that invalidate your feelings? While this will never stop, simply because controlling personalities will always try to control us through our emotions, it is important that you ignore their commands and accept that your feelings are yours to deal with as you see fit. If possible, avoid people who are intent on invalidating you.

2. Make your own plan

For those who are too busy trying to please others instead of pleasing themselves, navigating life without any plan or goal can seem like the only real way to live. The truth is that whoever values ​​himself also values ​​his life and that is why he wants to get the most out of it.

Think about the things that you would like to achieve in your life, then think about how long you think it will take you to achieve each of them. Your plan doesn’t have to consist of big, life-changing accomplishments, but also of smaller, less important things, like learning to knit or buying a bicycle.

Those who are used to you living your life to please them will no doubt try to tell you that you can’t change a plan once it’s done and if you do, you’re a loser who can’t get on with anything. That’s silly! Plans can and will be changed. Life is not rigid; Unexpected events happen that require us to change our plans, and many things can cause us to see things differently as we mature. As the late John Lennon said, life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans.

3. Be passionate about your life

There is only one certainty in this life and that is that one day you will die. How much time you have before that happens is anyone’s guess, but what you do with that time is entirely up to you.

Live your life to the fullest and believe that there is never a better time to do something than right now. Leaving things for another time is just a way to hide behind our fears, either that or sheer laziness.

By being passionate about your life, you are showing that you believe in yourself and your worth as a human being. Don’t let others dissuade you from doing what you choose. Listening to others tell you what they would do has no value to you: it is not them who do it, it is you and only you can know what is best for you.

4. Don’t be afraid of failure

Fear of failure prevents too many people from trying something new, especially when surrounded by negative people who will tell them “it will never work” or “you’ll be wasting your time” or “you’ll live to regret it.”

It may not work, but even if you don’t get the result you expected, it will still be a richer experience, and that’s certainly not a waste of time or something to regret.

Failure is part of life. If we were successful in everything we did, life would become boring and predictable. Dare to take a risk and inject some excitement into your life.

5. Illuminate

Don’t take life so seriously. Laughter really is great medicine, releasing endorphins (feel-good chemicals), relieving pain, and boosting our immune systems.

You may be chided for taking things lightly, but since this is your life and you make your own decisions, the opinions of others will no longer matter. Life is to enjoy it, why not enjoy it?

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